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¨ It’s been a very special Christmas season for me this year because my big old 6’5” boy, Jeff, has come home for a few days. He is a geologist in Dallas and works on projects from Pennsylvania to Nicaragua, so I seldom get to see him. Only God in heaven knows how much I yearn to just see him and talk face to face. The first night he was here we went to the Kopper Kettle for dinner and my sister called and asked if she and Mickey could join us and we said yes, and then my daughter and ex-wife, Shirley (Jeff’s mother), decided to come, so we had a large-table family feast. Our joy and laughter filled the place. It was like a baptism in pure bliss. ¨ I was equally joyful to see Jeff’s wife, Kat. She is a wonderfully creative woman with a world-class laugh. I wish I had an hour of her laughter on a CD. I would know I could forever whip the blues when they come calling with my “Kat Blues Zapper” CD. December is their anniversary time. She has been a big part of Jeff being happy for over 30 years. There’s something very right about a woman who can keep a man happy for over 30 years - a woman who can make a man want to come home for 30 years. There’s something very right about a man who can find happiness with a woman for over 30 years – a couple who continue to cherish and enjoy each other that long. It is something I have never experienced but God knows I respect and admire it. ¨ My only joys that are comparable to theirs in this season of remembering, are the great times I have had with special women all my life. Most of them were women I was not married to. Good times are good times, married or unmarried, and I have had so many good times in the arms and in the presence of great women, wives and otherwise. Some of the most special ones were women I was never intimate with. I think of Fabulous Funky Faye in a nursing home recovering from her third brain surgery and a wave of love, admiration and appreciation bursts forth from my innermost being. I think of Dot who is now in heaven and who believed in me all my life, in good times and bad, when I deserved it and when I didn’t. I think of Bernice who loves my songs and music so passionately and I want to say, “Bernice, I would have played every song I’ve ever played and written every song I’ve ever written if there had been no one but you to enjoy it all.” ¨ I have a sweet friend who is depressed in this season of joy. She is basically a positive person but as my mother once said, “All her circumstances have gotten involved.” Her depression is not unusual. The contrast between the bitter broth we may be drinking and the bubbly champagne we see all around us, can knock us down. On top of the contrast is the guilt we can feel for not feeling happy. It is not reasonable or logical but Freud accurately said man is not a rational creature, he is an emotional creature. Please … if you don’t have a friend who can listen you through a dark December, or give you some healing perspectives, find a good psychiatric social worker, psychologist, or psychiatrist to get you through it. I am not ashamed to admit I once sought the healing of a good psychiatrist. We are powerful beings but the most powerful among us have moments and times of need. Jesus hungered. Jesus wept. Jesus sought the comfort of his disciples, even asking them to wash His feet. We are humans. Let us not be ashamed of that. Let us rejoice that there are those with the love and skills to help us heal.
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